The Ways We Handle Life

This good looking piece of jewelry I'm wearing is a finger splint. I was on an innocent walk by the river last Saturday when I slipped off a rock and went down HARD. Hammered my pinky into a stone and fractured the bone in a couple places. OUCH!

I immediately knew that the location and the type of injury was my body's way of communicating an imbalance I needed to address. Obviously there was the very physical need to get the finger into traction and stabilize it. But once that was done, I knew there was more to do

Hands represent how one "handles" life. Each finger is a detail that allows us to interact with the world around us. When we are out of balance in the things we 'do', our fingers and hands show the stress.... hangnails, sloppy cuticles, enlarged knuckles, fingers twisting, lifting, or curving away from the others. These little nuances say a whole lot about how 'in-touch' we are with the world around us. For me, it was a call to action. A painful realization that I had broken not just my finger, but also an important relationship. Without thinking through the effect of my words, i spoke in a way that failed to respect someone whom I love dearly. Without thinking of the consequences, I said things that need not be said. And because of me someone's heart was breaking. I did not handle things well, and now my friend did not want to talk to me. That's what I had been thinking about moments before I fell down. And that was the energy that my body magnified through my fall.

I felt TERRIBLE, wracked with guilt, and empathy for the pain I inadvertently caused.

This energy Tune-up is for those times you recognize that you have made a mistake

First: OWN IT. There is nothing worse than thinking someone or something did this to you. It's your life, your choices, your actions, and your creative experience. Yes someone else may have been involved, but you cant change them. You can only deal with yourself . So OWN IT. Make it your problem because that's the only way you will resolve the situation and clear the air.

Next: FEEL IT. Now I know some feelings are down right nasty. Nobody likes the feelings of shame, sadness, guilt, or grief. But just like pride, joy, confidence, and belonging they are all feelings that are part of the experience of being human. if your life has brought you to a situation that calls for emotion, then it wants you to engage with the experience, feel it, wallow in it, absorb it, understand it, embrace it, love it, digest it, and know it intimately.

Then: TRANSFORM IT. If you have explored the emotion from all angles, felt the sharp discomfort and recognized the role you played, Then you can identify the better way you could have handled it. Instead of avoiding the shame, acknowledge it and recognize where you mis-stepped. After you've felt the grief, find what is missing in your life and look for ways to be complete. After the sadness, create moments of joy. The amazing thing about this is when you know what you don't want, you can fill your life with what you do desire. But you cant do that when you are running from the emotion, blaming others, or denying the role you played.

Finally: RELEASE IT. Forgiving means "for giving" you a new start. It means cutting the cords that tie you to the experience. It means 'for giving' you freedom to live your life in a courageous and a mindful way. In the school of life we all have lessons to learn. We can go around and around and around, or we can buckle down, figure it out, graduate, and move on.

A short while ago I made an error in judgement and didn't even know it till the damage was done. I stumbled and fell, breaking the finger that runs the energy of 'choices' and 'unconditional' love, straining the finger that reflects the energy of 'unions' and 'relationships'. I'm sorry. Forgive me. I'll handle things better next time.